When a person is emotionally overcharged or overwhelmed, the best thing to do is take a step back. A therapist once told a patient to "take 3 deep breaths and call him in the morning".I think that this is the cleverest concept expressed in the simplest way. It's all about perspective. At close range, things are always more urgent, a matter of life and death. When you take a few steps back, it's not that big a deal. When you look back in a couple days, you might not remember why it has bothered you so much.
I have taken to heart the phrase "this too, shall pass". I have begun to notice that telling someone something good has happened is considered bragging. Vice versa, telling somebody that something bad has happened is whining. The best line is "everything's okay".
A friend has told me to weigh what to say and to whom. She stresses the importance of targeting "the right person", meaning the person has to be completely on the same level as you are on that matter. If not, you would be either bragging or whining. Both extremely annoying. How true.
I am learning to say as little as possible about good fortune or bad luck. Never did it occur to me that sharing a piece of news would be bragging or whining. It's temporary anyway, for "this too, shall pass".
2 comments:
Whining and bragging... the concept is both correct and incorrect in my bible.
Because a good friend will hear you out no matter what, and because this is a good friend you would know when is not a good time to brag or whine too.
It's all about 'feeling' what others are 'feeling', no?
I am re-thinking about this whole concept. It's not so much about whining or bragging but "to whom".
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