Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Acquired Family

Today's entry on "A Year of Living Consciously" bears a remarkable resonance in my life. The title is "Having a Honey".


"...My family is fortunate to have had the same babysitter for almost 4 years. Two of my sons can't even remember another sitter. It's not just the long-standing nature of the relationship that's important, of cousrse "Honey", our sitter, is part of the family.

She is a child at heart and an adult in mind, the ideal combinations to make children feel happy and parents feel safe. Christopher, my eldest son, introduces her: "This is Honey. She's not just our friend. She's family." And this is the magic of Honey-she is one of those people who is so enmeshed, in all the right ways, in our lives, that she is, indeed, family. She is aquired family, the kind that I hope you also have in your circle of friends.

You are born into whatever family creates you. This is not about choice. (A sad fact) As children, you often absorb the ways of that family in ways that stay with you forever-although you do have choices about what you keep and what you discard as you get older. (Thank GOD)

But friends, friends are all about choice, about the freedom to surround yourself with the kind of people you want in your life. There is nothing artificial, nothing forced or contrived, in the best of your friensdhips: they are freely chosen, freely continued, and they make you larger that you might otherwise be. :D

Today, think about the circle of friends in your life: new friends and old familiar friends. They are woven into the fabric of your experience, knowing things about you, about the way you see the world.

Take a moment to appreciate your family of friends, they are a gift you give yourself every day.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Friends and family seem to mean different as I age.
All the same, more appreciated.

Anonymous said...

As we age, different things take on different meanings. Yup appreciation is the key to happiness.

Anonymous said...

朋友及家人實在有太大的分別,這涉及有得選擇及沒有選擇的分別;如果朋友令你無自由,令你傷心難受,大不了與他隔絕,從此你有你,我有我;不過家人就難有這自由,最難頂是他們會不斷提醒你,他們曾經如何為你付出(但其實是他們以為付出),有時真的令人透不過氣!

Anonymous said...

我完全同意,尤其是透不過氣的部份!!

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